As I walked onto the range
and took the 9mm pistol
in my hand
it was not fear I felt
but familiarity even
confidence
for I'd seen it done
a thousand ways
played with countless
toys near exact
in their replica
of the real.
I loaded the clip
then popped it in
chambered a round
and I had a live
murder machine
in my grasp
and it was not strange
it was completely
and utterly normal
even casual.
As I fired
shooting decently
I deep revulsion
began to build up in me
not for the weapon
nor for those
with some affection for it
but for the ease of it all
how fast and ordinary
it was
to shoot a handgun
then a rifle
then an assault weapon
as if these killing tools
were the most common things
the subject of non-chalance
rather than respect.
The gun itself
is just an object
its the indifference
that terrified me.
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