1. Call Them By Their First Names- When meeting a friend or lovers parents you don't want to set up a subservient dynamic or a generational divide. Call them by their first names, using Mister or Misses is a thing we should put to bed with our teens when interacting interpersonally outside of work. Using first names breeds familiarity and casualness, that''s the kind of dynamic you want to enter into, parents are just people after all.
2. Be Polite But Not Too Polite- Everyone deserves respect especially individuals of an older generation. Some people may adhere to stricter manners than others so get a sense of where they stand before you put your feet up on the coffee table, chew with your mouth open, swear, or refer to sex. You also don't want to come off as a stuffed shirt. Act like yourself but always remember your pleases and your thank yous.
3. Let Them Pay- More often than not the older folks are going to want to pick up the check when you're out to eat. Be ready to pay your way(keep this in mind when ordering) but relent if the parent of your friend or lover offers and/or persists. Do not insist on picking up the check yourself or paying your part of the check. This will get parents mad and/or put them off.
4. Crack Some Jokes- Feel free to talk to them like one of your friends. Make some jokes and try to get them laughing. There's nothing like laughter to bring people closer together. A well timed off-color joke can do wonders to get peoples defenses down but remember to use discretion and gauge your audience.
5. Ask Questions- Parents are curious about who their son or daughter is friends with or dating, they may ask you a lot of questions, they may also feel like they should ask you a lot of questions because of some predisposed societal construct. Answer their questions then give them a question. Get to know them while they get to know you. People enjoy talking about themselves, it's a fact. Keep the playing field even.
All interactions should support the idea of respectful peer, you're not a kid you're an adult.
No comments:
Post a Comment