Restless

People talk about
mid-life crises
as if they're rare
but ennui
is more common
than serenity
passive desire
and
thwarted ambition
more seductive
than contentment
at least for me
I fantasize
about new professions
weekly
replay my life
with different
machinations
towards an outcome
wildly divergent
from the present
not because it is sour,
painful, or a shame
only that its too much the same.