On a crowded rush hour brownline train. Fullterton stop. A man is playing some middling electronic/pop/R&B loudly on a portable stereo. I suspect the music is self produced.
Woman: Put your headphones in.
Man: What?
Woman: Come on. Listen on your headphones.
Man: Who do you think you are. Shut your mouth bitch.
Woman: Just put your headphones in. No one wants to hear that.
Man: No one else is saying anything. Whats your fucking problem. Mind your own fucking business. Your lucky I don't hit women. But I know people. I could get people to take care of you.
Woman#2: Give it a rest. Turn that crap off.
Man: So disrespectful! Why you being so disrespectful to me! Keep yourself to yourself and leave me alone.
Woman#2: Disrespectful!?! You're the one that's being disrespectful to everyone on this train. And making threats-
Man: I didn't make any threats.
Woman: Yes. You threatened me.
Man: No. I said...I said I don't hit women...but I know ladies who do.
Woman: Your being rude.
Man: I'm being me and you're going to have to deal with it. You can't tell me what to do. I'm going to do what I'm going to do and you can't stop me.
The man turns up his music and the train is silent other than the refrain of the pulsing chorus "fuck love" repeating over and over again.
Four stops later at Southport the man is about to exit.
Man: What's your name?
Woman: Mary.
The man exits the train. Both women who have spoken to him clap and cheer. They are joined by a smattering of other commuters. Mostly though everyone has politely ignored the whole interaction.
Thursday, April 30, 2015
Wednesday, April 29, 2015
A Disturbing Dream 17
I am in a large house. I'm staying with a friend or an acquaintance.
I wake up from an afternoon nap and the house is empty.
For some reason I'm drawn to the basement which is also a partial garage.
A begin searching through the boxes, bikes, and miscellaneous equipment.
Behind a box I find my dog Pepper who was put to sleep five years ago.
She has three legs. A new development.
She hobbles out to me, her tail wagging, and I collapse on the floor stunned and elated.
She climbs into my lap, I cradle her, she licks my face.
I wonder if she has been alive this whole time. If my dad did not in fact put her to sleep five years ago. That maybe he simply set her loose, unable to go through with it. And during the course of those intervening years she lost a leg. Or, I think, maybe that was the price she had to pay to comeback.
I find a leash in the garage and take her for a walk. We are in LA and its warm. Pepper is as excitable and joyous as I remember. We walk along basking in the sunlight, I contented and feeling whole, Pepper sniffing everything she can get her nose in front of.
I fade out of the dream and into my bed slowly, filled with a deep melancholy for my loving and loyal companion who has moved on.
I wake up from an afternoon nap and the house is empty.
For some reason I'm drawn to the basement which is also a partial garage.
A begin searching through the boxes, bikes, and miscellaneous equipment.
Behind a box I find my dog Pepper who was put to sleep five years ago.
She has three legs. A new development.
She hobbles out to me, her tail wagging, and I collapse on the floor stunned and elated.
She climbs into my lap, I cradle her, she licks my face.
I wonder if she has been alive this whole time. If my dad did not in fact put her to sleep five years ago. That maybe he simply set her loose, unable to go through with it. And during the course of those intervening years she lost a leg. Or, I think, maybe that was the price she had to pay to comeback.
I find a leash in the garage and take her for a walk. We are in LA and its warm. Pepper is as excitable and joyous as I remember. We walk along basking in the sunlight, I contented and feeling whole, Pepper sniffing everything she can get her nose in front of.
I fade out of the dream and into my bed slowly, filled with a deep melancholy for my loving and loyal companion who has moved on.
Tuesday, April 28, 2015
Social Contract
I may be getting older
or not as prey
to technologically induced myopathy
as some of my fellow citizens-
I still value propriety,
space,
and privacy-
expect a certain polite distance
when waiting in line
at Mariano's
or when selecting seats
at the movie theater.
I do not force
my inane blather
or irksome eccentricities
on strangers.
Public is a common space
for a quiet, calm, and reserved face.
Private. Well. Do what ever it is you like.
I'll not impune on you
and simply ask the same in kind.
or not as prey
to technologically induced myopathy
as some of my fellow citizens-
I still value propriety,
space,
and privacy-
expect a certain polite distance
when waiting in line
at Mariano's
or when selecting seats
at the movie theater.
I do not force
my inane blather
or irksome eccentricities
on strangers.
Public is a common space
for a quiet, calm, and reserved face.
Private. Well. Do what ever it is you like.
I'll not impune on you
and simply ask the same in kind.
Monday, April 27, 2015
On Friendship
Read this at Quenchers tonight, I wrote it for my friend Heather. We've been friends since working at summer camp together in 2000. She leaves Chicago after 12 years in June.
I've never been great at making friends. I can be reserved, isolated. Sometimes aggressive or awkward. But for whatever reason I've had incredible luck when its come to friends. I, with no trace of irony, am blessed with the most gracious, kind, and giving companions. Spoiled by the inexhaustible gifts of friendship I have the fortune to receive. I hope I have been able to return a fraction of these gifts with loyalty, concern, and care.
Over the past year many friends have left Chicago and that trend shows no signs of slowing. As we age new paths are carved out before us, new adventures present themselves for exploration, and we outgrow our current circumstances. Many have felt it is time to move on and justly so. Forward lies the future, further out lies the seductive unknown.
Soon one of my oldest and dearest friends will leave Chicago. It hits me harder than all other departures that have gone before. It may cause me some personal discomfort but this is not a cause for grief only celebration.
Each of us is on a journey. Often times we walk together sharing company and love. But life, ever complicated, has surprises for us all. So you may be called to go your way and I may be called to go mine. But the bond thats connected us will not dissolve in time.
And although miles may separate us and experience diverge our lives you are my always, constant, loving friend until the day I die.
I've never been great at making friends. I can be reserved, isolated. Sometimes aggressive or awkward. But for whatever reason I've had incredible luck when its come to friends. I, with no trace of irony, am blessed with the most gracious, kind, and giving companions. Spoiled by the inexhaustible gifts of friendship I have the fortune to receive. I hope I have been able to return a fraction of these gifts with loyalty, concern, and care.
Over the past year many friends have left Chicago and that trend shows no signs of slowing. As we age new paths are carved out before us, new adventures present themselves for exploration, and we outgrow our current circumstances. Many have felt it is time to move on and justly so. Forward lies the future, further out lies the seductive unknown.
Soon one of my oldest and dearest friends will leave Chicago. It hits me harder than all other departures that have gone before. It may cause me some personal discomfort but this is not a cause for grief only celebration.
Each of us is on a journey. Often times we walk together sharing company and love. But life, ever complicated, has surprises for us all. So you may be called to go your way and I may be called to go mine. But the bond thats connected us will not dissolve in time.
And although miles may separate us and experience diverge our lives you are my always, constant, loving friend until the day I die.
Sunday, April 26, 2015
Graffiti 158
"To merely observe your culture without contributing to it seems very close to existing as a ghost." -Chuck Palahniuk
"Monsters are real, and ghosts are real too. They live inside us, and sometimes, they win." -Stephen King
Saturday, April 25, 2015
Creative Satisfaction
This afternoon Tim and I put some finishing touches on the first three episodes of season one of Hindsight Hour- our new podcast. It's been a great editing process, things have gone a lot faster then they did with Bubble Boys because we figured out and learned a lot from that experience. This has been much more streamlined.
The editing has been very collaborative between Tim and I, going into it I didn't have any firm ideas that I wanted implement just a couple reference points and a general goal of experimentation. Because of that a lot of the transitions and audio accents came up organically and it has exactly the type of serio-comic abstract feel that I was going for.
After listening to the first couple episodes it turned out exactly how I wanted it to. The idea that I had last summer we were able to realize almost perfectly. Whether it will be successful as far as some of the broader goals or even be entertaining remains to be seen, I'm eager to put it out there and get some feedback.
Regardless of how it will be received its incredibly satisfying to have an abstract idea and to be able to translate into something(more-or-less) tangible and concrete. To be able to create something that mirrors that thought in your head. I think people will like it, I think its engaging, I hope people respond to it. But even before people get a chance to hear it there is immense fulfillment in the act of creation in and of itself.
The editing has been very collaborative between Tim and I, going into it I didn't have any firm ideas that I wanted implement just a couple reference points and a general goal of experimentation. Because of that a lot of the transitions and audio accents came up organically and it has exactly the type of serio-comic abstract feel that I was going for.
After listening to the first couple episodes it turned out exactly how I wanted it to. The idea that I had last summer we were able to realize almost perfectly. Whether it will be successful as far as some of the broader goals or even be entertaining remains to be seen, I'm eager to put it out there and get some feedback.
Regardless of how it will be received its incredibly satisfying to have an abstract idea and to be able to translate into something(more-or-less) tangible and concrete. To be able to create something that mirrors that thought in your head. I think people will like it, I think its engaging, I hope people respond to it. But even before people get a chance to hear it there is immense fulfillment in the act of creation in and of itself.
Friday, April 24, 2015
Anti-Cruise
One of his main points of discourse is his ideology- The Cruise- compromising adventure, experimentation, experience, and basically living life to its fullest. The force, he says, opposing this is the anti-cruise manifesting itself in things as small as roadblocks or detours to organizations as large as law enforcement and the government itself. The anti-cruise is to be evaded and thwarted at all costs.
A couple years ago I noticed these signs going up around Chicago "No Cruising Zone". Upon some investigation it appears it is in reference to an ordnance which makes people who drive through these neighborhoods more than once in an hour subject to a written warning and eventual fines. The stated intent is to relieve congestion. Any time I see these signs I can't help but think of Levitch.
This sign is a very clear manifestation of the anti-cruise. And I have no doubt the intention of the Chicago Municipal Code is to restrict its citizens sense of adventure and exploration. To restrict, contain, and control.
Chicago, the sprawling metropolis of the middle west, holds untold mystery and beauty if you are brave enough to seek it out.
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