Top 5 Movies of 2017

Top 5:
The Big Sick
The Florida Project
Get Out
Girls Trip
Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

Honorable Mentions:
Band Aid
Blade Runner 2049
Columbus
An Inconvenient Sequel
Kedi
The Lost City of Z
Okja
Patti Cake$
A Quiet Passion
T2 Trainspotting

Top 5 Disappointments:
Battle of the Sexes
Dark Tower
Dunkirk
The Square
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets

Most Underrated:
Brigsby Bear

Most Overrated:
Call Me By Your Name

Worst Movie Of The Year:
A Ghost Story

Performances Of The Year:
Tiffany Haddish, Girls Trip
Charlie Hunnam, The Lost City of Z
Laurie Metcaff, Lady Bird
Frances McDormant & Sam Rockwell, Three Billboards
Salma Hayek, Beatrix At Dinner

Scenes Of The Year:
Kitchen Argument- The Killing of a Sacred Deer
The Fall of the Valkyries- Thor: Ragnarok
"Take Me Home, Country Road"- Logan Lucky
Dance Off- Old School vs. New, Girls Trip
No Man's Land, Wonder Woman

Portent of the Future

Years ago
I went with my sister and mother
to Brown University
scouting the place
for my sibling's potential
collegiate home
and I don't remember much
as I was twelve
but I do remember
the soda machines
which could be charged
to your meal plan
with your student ID
as it was 1996
this was quite breathtaking
and technologically advanced
how easy
how convenient
how delicious
what a marvel
higher learning must be
I thought
what wonders the future must hold
for myself
and the world.

I was wrong and I was right.

'Hostiles' A Review

Hostiles is a western set in 1892 about soon-to-retire Captain Blocker(Christian Bale) and his last mission- to escort prisoner of war Yellow Hawk(Wes Studi) and his family from the New Mexico fort where they've been incarcerated for years to his tribal lands in Montana. After encoutntering and folding in the survivor of a raid Mrs. Quaid(Rosamund Pike) Blocker, his soldiers, and the prisoners have to contend with a number of varied enemies and problems, as well as prejudice, along their journey.

Bale is immersive and compelling as he always is, certainly one of the greatest actors working today, he has a seamless chemistry with the other actors in his unit, he speaks Cheyenne with a surprising delicacy, and he makes the suspect psychological journey his character goes on almost believable. Studi and the other Native actors aren't given given nearly enough time to develop, they are no question capable and interesting performers but they have very little to do, for a movie ostensibly about the coming together of these polarized groups one of them remains sorely under represented. Pike's performance, save for one riveting silent grave-digging scene, is flat and bizarrely out-of-place almost Cageian in its mechanical and presentational tone. Clearly a substantial amount of work was done by the other soldiers under Bale's characters command. Jonathan Majors is especially exceptional, sharing a scene with Bale that is easily the best of the film and shows the potential that either because of the script, direction, edit, or studio involvement was not reached. Rory Cochrane is also a refreshing competent presence.

Visually the film is stunning, wide panoramic plains and vistas, forests and mountains. Really rich epic scenery. Unfortunately the film doesn't trust the audience to pick up on any emotional and moral complexity so the Message, the Theme, are so blatant and cumbersome and ineffective it undermines what could have been a great film.

Worth a watch for the actors and scenery but not worth paying for.

Rent It.

The Fun Van

At some point growing up
my dad bought a full sized van
that someone, perhaps myself
as I was the youngest
or my sister who
was far more clever
dubbed "the fun van".

There was a TV
Captains chairs
a way way back
and a ladder bolted
on the rear door
many nooks and crannies
to explore and burrow into
hiding places for little treasures.
(including me)

For years we drove
cross-country
to family reunions
vacations and visits
coasting along in our
comfortable yet cumbersome
box on wheels
watching classics like
Adventures In Babysitting
and singing Dr. Hook's
The Cover of 'Rolling Stone'
as we ate mile after mile
on the way to Philadelphia
Phoenix, DC, Des Moines, St. Louis,
St. Germain, Menominee, Minneapolis
into the sunset of my youth.

Romantic Conflict

Recently some friends told me some things they've said to their partners when they were fighting that kind of shocked me in how combative they were. After asking around it seems its not too out of the norm for people to lash out in their LTR in this way when arguing.

To me the idea of telling my partner to "fuck off" or deliberately being condescending, insulting, or pointedly angry is pretty out there. Walks, if not totally obliterates, the line of dysfunction. But that's me and the way I operate in a relationship is different than what works for other people. Some people need the conflict to air out resentments and fears they may not have been capable of voicing outside the context of a fight. Sometimes that personality clash, that emotional explosion, is necessary, its cathartic. As long as there is resolution, as long as communication is ongoing, as long as it works, who am I to judge. Ultimately it's just a matter of perspective and viewing any situation like 'this is the way I do it and therefore that is categorically correct' is not only wrong its self-centered to the extreme.

I use to be a pretty angry guy, unpredictable with SO's, friends, and strangers alike in when I would vent my temper. Part of that was just who I was, the only way I knew to express emotion, maybe my preferred method for doing so. The other part of why I acted like that, operated out of a baseline of fear that came out as anger was because of my addiction. After I got sober I did, and still do, a lot of work on changing my behavior, how I process my feelings, and how I react to people and situations. What that amounts to is basically building in a pause(or attempting to) between my initial emotional reaction to things and when I respond. Feeling my feelings and then examining my initial response before speaking it aloud. With potential arguments or stressful situations my initial response is almost always rude or combative or counterproductive or all three. And so most times I don't. I say nothing, I walk away, I take some time and put together a constructive response.

Yesterday Nicole and I both got home late and were hungry. When I was getting out of the shower she asked me to clean out the drain more frequently. My head immediately went to tallying the various chores we do to keep the apartment in order and, of course, painted myself as the one who shouldered the majority of the burden and fanned the flames of my offense that she would even ask me that given all the other stuff I do. What I said was "OK" and walked away. After I had eaten I realized I didn't really care, the reality was that I'd be happy to take an extra ten seconds to wipe some toilet paper over the drain. We talked it out a bit more and it was all good. If I had lashed out, she would have most likely responded in kind, the conversation wouldn't have really gone any where, and it would have taken the evening maybe even the next day or two for the tension to dissipate. But that's us.

We all communicate in our own particular ways that work for us. Some more combative than others, some more reserved than others. But the important thing is to do the communicating. To put thought to voice, to listen and attempt some mutual understanding. Bottled up issues turn into resentments so its important to talk about those things we want or need or believe before they boil over. The other side of it is a discussion or suggestion or request isn't necessarily an attack or judgement even though it can feel that way. It's tough. But as long as you try, as long as you keep the conversation going, however imperfectly, you can emerge on the other end better partners. It's silence that can be the relationship killer.

'Call Me By Your Name' A Review

Call Me By Your Name is a coming of age drama set in 1983 about 17-year-old Elio(Timothée Chalamet) and his burgeoning friendship/relationship with, supposed, 24-year-old grad student Oliver(Armie Hammer) who is staying with him and his parents at their Italian estate where they summer.

Chalamet is decent, Hammer is charming but the two have no chemistry. Their dynamic doesn't go beyond a kind of combative immature flirtation. Their desire is somewhat believable but romance, love? No. Elio's parents give more fully formed performances, Michael Stuhlbarg and Amira Casar, and the characters are accepting of their son(kind of a fresh take) which is played with grace but ultimately there's not much there. The bulk of what is going on is rich people lazing about in the sun shirtless. Esther Garrel as Marzia is a bright spot but is constrained by the surprisingly contrived beats her character is forced to follow.

Visually lush and beautifully evocative of Italy the cinematography is easily the best element of the film. Almost every other element of the film is different grades of problematic. Virtually no time is spent on developing the character of Elio so his personality and what he's actually feeling and going through is unclear. As a result what we see is an intelligent, entitled, piano playing, socially awkward, rich kid who's kind of an asshole. As the film unfolds its also unclear what conflict he's actually encountering. The Oliver character is equally vague. There are a couple scenes between the two where both the text is unclear(script problem) as well as the subtext(acting problem). It's unclear if the characters are grappling with their sexuality, their age difference, or simply the awkwardness and hedonistic eagerness of youth. Not in a way where all the subtext are implied and the dynamic feels rich with meaning but in a way where it seems vital and creative decisions haven't been made and it's the result is an emotional nebulousness.

There is a monologue by Stuhlbarg at the end which is being lauded however it also suffers from this same murkiness and lack of choice which casts not only this potentially moving monologue in doubt but the whole film. There is a lot of kissing and rubbing of hands and lips and faces between the two leads but when they actually get to the sex the camera pans to the open window like some 60's sitcom. There is no panning away however during the straight sex scene that proceeds it which seems at best odd and unsettling. There's also the treatment of the character Marzia who Elio has sex with one day, abandons the next, then three days later apropos of nothing she forgives him. This not to mention the two scenes that feature dribbling semen which all taken together make for a messy hodgepodge of a a period drama complete with unflattering 80's attire not something best-of-the-year worthy.

The affluence almost decadent wealth on display in the film is off putting, the relationship at the center problomatic because of an age difference which is never actually addressed, the script is vague to the point of lacking motivation and even emotional coherence.

Call Me By Your Name is worthy of a watch no question, this more critical than usual review not-with-standing, but is this mediocre and melodramatic rich kid romance one of the best movies of the year? Absolutely not. It is wonderful that more movies are coming out with diverse perspectives and characters. But some of them will be uneven. Maybe entertaining but not exceptional.

Rent It.

The Body

Although
the vitality of youth
is fading
or lets be honest
gone
I feel more solid
than ever
more at home
and capable
in my suit
of muscle, flesh, and bone
more fluid and myself
even graceful
not like a dancer
or wild cat
more a domesticated
and aging hound
comfortable
and
competent
not to say I am some speicmen
of mammalian might
but I have a certain strength
and stamina
(as do we all)
and know my limits
and can ply my will
with some measure
of head and limb
harmony
gone are the gangly days
the awkward days
the stumbling, bumbling, mumbling days
of juvenescence.

My health and vigor
may require more attention
but this mortal meat and marrow
I call Me
is Mine
with more Alacrity than ever.