Yesterday I accidentally over slept and was late for work. No particular reason aside from snoozing my alarm one to many times and burning the candle at both ends a bit. It's the kind of thing I use to do when I was drinking- chronic tardiness.
It's odd how some of those old habits come creeping back. Even without the booze, the despair, the deceit I still have a problem with punctuality. An issue work places don't overlook. It's certainly no where near what it use to be but it's still a bit discouraging to have these unproductive old modes of operation that are still lingering.
There were no repercussions but my supervisor did reference this other guy who use to work at my company, this guy who I think had a drinking problem, he made a very loose comparison to this guy because he said he was a bit worried. This guy once didn't show up for a couple hours because he had been jumped the night before. Of course with me I was only delayed about fifteen minutes but the comparison kind of brought me up short.
I'm almost two and a half years sober at this point but I'm constantly reminded that its a process not a switch that gets flipped. I'm never going to be cured. Sobriety and a sober life is something you work at every day, one day at a time. There are successes and failures and you keep moving forward doing the best you can utilizing the tools you have and by reaching out to people.
I may never completely shake some of my more ingrained negative habits but I can now recognize them and take productive actions to try to rectify them. No one is perfect, we're all works in progress.
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