Graffiti 129

This reminds me of a song we use to sing at camp- "Alice The Camel". It's an absurd chant-type counting song. This goofy picture reminds me of song&story time after lunch. The whole camp would gather, probably 50 or so kids, and I'd lead them all in a series of these funny almost child-folk songs. Passed down for decades, the original artists totally forgotten. "Cannibal King" "Billboard Song" "Wishy-Washy-Washer Woman" "3 Little Angles" most of them with some truly bizarre content in retrospect.

I kind of found my singing voice as a camper and as a camp leader. So this little green camel brings back a lot of good memories.

'X-Men: Days Of Future Past' A Discussion

X-Men: Days Of Future Past is the most recent Marvel Superhero movie combining the actors from X-Men: First Class and the original X-Men trilogy who play the same characters with a time travel plot device. In lieu of a normal review here is a conversation about the movie with my good friend Vince Portacci.

Me: Overall what did you think of the movie?

Vince:  I thought it was just fine.  I thought X-Men: First Class showed how good an X-Men movie could be and this was an attempt to capitalize on that.  Bryan Singer probably felt like he had some cleaning up to do after the third installment.  I also think this was a strategic move by Marvel to reset everything and hopefully give them a chance to refresh the cast and kinda restart under the overall Marvel umbrella.  Like, Wolverine is an Avenger for a time, this hopefully allows a tie in for that at some point.

Me:  Yeah, I think I liked it OK. Liked the meshing of the freshness of First Class with the older characters who we know and like. The future element and the past element I thought were visually very cool and the future actions scenes at the beginning were cool. I think I was missing some heart. Like, it didn't really recapture the magic of the characters of the first two or first class.

Vince:  I did like seeing the new and old versions of the characters in the same movie.  I had a hard time with how everything required so much exposition and as a result were unable to go deep with anyone character except for maybe Professor X.

Me:  Good point. The conceit is very cool but I don't think they needed to explain it so much. Presumably comic book fans get it. I thought it was nice to get a bit more of Jennifer Lawrence as Mystique but I don't know if she was actually developed as a character she just had more screen time.

Vince:  I agree. The movie hinges on her character turning so drastically to the point that Magneto and Professor X view her as an ultimate threat.  Yet, we see no clear example of this in her behavior or character. Quicksilver was a big highlight for me.  Showing super speed in various cool ways.  The only miss in my opinion was not using him at the end.  It culminates in DC and even shows him watching this unfold on the TV.  I wanted to see him get in on the action.

Me:  For sure, my favorite sequence was the pentagon jail break, probably my favorite scene the stand off where time slows down and he adjusts all the guards and their bullets and stuff. Visually cool and indirectly implies how powerful a mutant he is. As far as freshness and obviously enjoying it Quicksilver was my favorite performance. He added a much needed playfulness.

Vince:  I applaud them for not using a CGI beast.  But man, that makeup job was insane.  He looked awful.

Me:  Oh yeah. Just the worst. Looked worse than Michael J. Fox in Teen Wolf. All patchy and stuff.

Vince:  I liked how they used the future mutants like Bishop and Blink just as an attack and defense unit.  When I saw the cast list I was like, whoa, there are WAY too many mutants in this thing.

Me:  Yeah plot wise I thought it was exposition heavy but I thought it was well done to incorporate the future and past mutants with not one by one explaining all their powers. I also really liked the Vietnam sequence. Do you think this one had an overt message either politically or socially?

Vince:  I think the overall message was sort of like, "Hey, before you do something drastic, think it through".  I think the X-Men is really an examination of race relations and there are strong ties between this and the idea of a final solution.  Maybe also, violence only begets more violence is the strong take away.

Me:  For sure that is X-men overarching message, I feel like this one, it was there certainly, it just felt a little watered down or muddled.

Vince:  It just didn't feel fresh.

Me:  Better put, yes.

Vince:  And I think that is the challenge with these super hero movies. I think we want to see OLD concepts presented in fresh new ways each time out.  We want  to see these characters tested and put through the ringer and see that they can triumph when there core beliefs are challenged in different ways and maybe when they go through a change.

Me:  I have been thinking recently we may be reaching a saturation point with the comic book movie machine. That there's just too much of it out there to even be able to make it fresh.
You tangentially mentioned the ending initially, how did you like it?

Vince:  I thought it was just fine.  There is a layer of cheese to the movie.  It felt very safe and happy.  I would have loved to see the cost to a particular character's mental state as a result of everything he remembers up until a certain point now being un-true.  God, that idea is fascinating to me. If you change the course of history and you have all these deep emotions and memories that are tied to things that never happened, man, that would be the most lonely and terrifying thing ever. Even though you saved the world, that is still something you have to deal with.

Me:  Yeah, Wolverine seems totally unfazed or at least there isn't time spent on him reacting to anything cause that is the end of the movie. It didn't exactly bother me. But I just felt like it was too cheesy, too sweet, like come on. OK fine, go back 15 years and reset the whole franchise.

Any final thoughts? Is it worth a watch?

Vince:  If you have a hankering for a summertime movie blockbuster, go see it.  Its worth seeing on a big screen.  Its fun but its not the X-Men movie we all want.

I guess we will still have to wait on that.

Meatmorial Day

Rourke hosted his annual Memorial day cook out dubbed, as are many, Meatmorial. I went to it last year and it was a lot of the same people one guy, a college friend, I hadn't seen since the same event last year. Pat bought a bunch of meat, people brought a bunch of meat, and the grill was going full tilt the whole time.

It was a beautiful day and a great crowd of people. There's something very comforting being in a crowd of 40 people or so and knowing most of them one way or another. People, for the most part, with a common passion.

The sun, the food, and the company made it a truly wonderful laid back holiday.

For a long time I never felt a part of. I was uncomfortable at parties and in crowds. I preferred solitude and limited social interactions. Over the past two years I've become more comfortable and open. Gotten to know more people. And the result is an ease when navigating big get togethers and a desire for them. I discovered a real joy being around large groups of friends, feeding off the energy, and soaking in people just being around each other.

This aversion of course was related to my drinking, a symptom, and now somewhat free from it I can be in a crowd and not only resist the urge to drink but have no craving to. At one point Steph's boyfriend and I were chatting. I was smoking and he brought over a bottle of champagne. He offered me some and I told him I didn't drink, told him I was recovering. He responded "That must be really hard. At a thing like this especially." After he said that I thought about it, investigated my feelings, and found to my surprise I had no desire to drink, none at all. I was truly comfortable and happy. I sighed at what a gift it was. And finished my cigarette.

Some addictions are better than others.

Church Of Cinema

Growing up Lutheran
I never felt the touch of God
in the slate gray narthex
or in the basement Sunday school
or during the preachers monotone pronouncements.

Never felt the need to worship
at a cross or stained glass window
over donuts and stale coffee.
Never felt a thing
with a dissolving wafer on my tongue
or a shot of cheap wine warming my belly.

From my first double feature
Jurassic Park morning and afternoon
my moments of grace came from
dark rooms with raked seats
from vibrant stories
offering escape
with secret friends quietly entranced
by lands I had never known.

My offering is $10.50
my alter a blank screen
whether peace or hope or excitement
a blessing I receive.

I worship in a darkened room
in a crowd of strangers
previews, popcorn, and some solace
I see it as my savior.

A Parable About Isolation

There once was a boy alone on New Years Eve.
He had many friends.
And places to go.
But no gilded invitation.
So, stubborn and forlorn.
The boy sat in his room.
Alone.
And sulked.
Wishing his friends had made more of an effort to include him.
To cater to him.
Pamper him.
Faun on him and make him feel special.
In his room he resented and stewed.
Quite lonely and sad he waited for something outside to prompt him to leave.
Even though he very much wanted to leave.
He did not know that sometimes, included or excluded.
Invitation or ignorance.
You must make the first step out into the world.
To see the smiling faces of friends.
To feel the wind on your cheek.
To hear the whisper of spring turning into summer.
Life cannot seek you out.
If you have shut out the world.

'Chef' A Review

Chef is a feel good comedy from writer, director and star Jon Favreau. Favreau plays frustrated, over-worked, divorcee chef Carl Casper. In his LA restaurant he is forced by the owner to continue to make the same boring menu. After a biting review Casper has a major meltdown and is fired. He goes back to Miami with his ex-wife and son, buys a food truck, and travels back to LA with son in toe getting his groove back.

Across the board the performances are natural and engaging. Lead by Sofia Vergara as Favreau's kind and caring ex-wife and John Leguizamo as best-friend Martin. There is also two high impact cameos from Amy Sadaris and Robert Downey Jr. The humor in the film is very organic with few set-up punch-line type jokes but lots of laughs.

The back to basics story line is an obvious mirror of Favreau's own work, having not made something this paired down or with as much heart since his debut Swingers. The characters are real, the passion for food infectious, the chemistry bubbling. The film only makes one small misstep with a super-sweet too-good-to-be-believed ending but the wrap up is so quick you barely notice.

Sincere, genuine, and surprisingly funny.

See It.

Mountain Top Water Drop

The third installment in Beanpole and I's quote collaboration. This comes from the inspired yet poorly received documentary I'm Still Here about Joaquin Phoenix's maybe fake/maybe real retirement from acting and his attempt at a hip-hop career. In the most engaging scene of the film Edward James Olmos gives Joaquin an inspired new age pep-talk.

"I'm a mountain-top water-drop."

Graffiti 128

According to Tisher this stencil is a Companion Cube from the video game Portal. An interesting choice for graffiti. Portal being a puzzle solving type game maybe its some kind of comment on the world being one large game, our lives puzzles to be solved. Maybe the intention is to advocate real life as opposed to virtual life, some kind of criticism of our ever increasing and engrossing digital age. Maybe someone just really likes Portal. Who knows. I gave up video games in college after a thirty hour bender.

"I always felt really guilty if I spent too much time playing video games. It's a colossal waste of time. And I can't say it's a very satisfying feeling at the end of the day, if you've spent eight hours playing a video game; you just end up feeling kind of spent, and used." -John C. Riley

"This generation is so dead. You ask a kid, 'What are you doing this Saturday?' and they'll be playing video games or watching cable, instead of building model cars or airplanes or doing something creative. Kids today never say, 'Man, I'm really into remote-controlled steamboats.'" -Jack White

Patterns and Micro-Narrative

After Prime on Sunday Scott made a very astute comment. "It works when we do the same, like, four things." Recently we've been on a streak of, mostly, good shows. And Scott hit upon the common thread between them. We function most effectively when we set up a mini-narrative, like a short one act, and cycle through it 3 or 4 times until it comes to a natural point of conclusion or its heightened into absurdity. I feel like we've had a similar kind of success with Schwa the last couple weeks, creating shows with a discernible theme or defining characteristic.

I am most satisfied when an improv show feels of a piece, has some singularity. The key is recognizing patterns, repeating elements, and developing a sequence of scenes resembling a narrative. Strictly narrative based improv(like an improvised play) can be difficult and at times tedious(in a more conventional longform) but developing a series of scenes that tangentially relate, that have a loose story arc or thematic similarity, is a good outline to embellish on. Whether by repeating the established sequence with the same characters and different context or with different characters and the same set up you build upon the audiences and fellow players familiarity with what was initially introduced. With a solidified rubric for a show the players are actually freed up to experiment and riff. After the initial sequence/scenes/set up is repeated the format is locked into place and there is no negotiation between the players about what is going on. No hesitation, no indecision. Physical or verbal cues will instantly be recognizable because they are echos of whats already been done.

There are many different methods which yield the same result. Repeating specific words or phrases. Repeating specific physicality or stage picture. Internal mechanisms like telling stories, fortune telling, or narrating. Sometimes breaking the fourth wall and flat out saying the theme, pattern or story although that can be significantly more tricky. Couple some or all that with a premise/theme set up through a sequence of scenes that you repeat variations on and you are most likely going to create something unique and focused.

Hunger

As I passed a post-rain graveyard

the smell of worms filled my nostrils
I stopped and wondered who last visited
this row of stones
how long and who last saw those bones.
And now, after a storm, the worms all bloated
slime and slither and eat whats rotted.
Do the ghosts mind? I stand and ponder.
Or are they grateful
for any kind of company.

Do It Yourself

I've never been a handy type of guy. Don't know how to change oil in a car, don't know how to change a bicycle tire. I called my dad when my motorcycle battery died and he said he'd call some buddies and call me back. The next day he left me a voice mail which basically said "get a new battery and plop it in there". I don't know what I expected exactly but I think part of me wanted him to take care of it. Childish and immature I know but the idea of changing out the battery myself was daunting. I called him back and had him describe to me how to do it. I also talked to Andy from Schwa, the only other guy in Chicago I know who rides, he told me to take the old battery to Autozone and they would size me up a new one.

I set off this afternoon without much hope but determined to give it a try. Muscling the battery out was easier than I thought, Tisher picked me up and took me to Autozone where I got a replacement battery no problem. Back at the bike I took the battery out of the package, I had to pour the acid in myself, and while it was settling I read in the instructions it "may need to be pre-charged". It was a punch in the gut. Tisher and I got some ice cream and took a walk around the block. Gave the acid some time to do its work.

With sever doubts I hugged Tisher goodbye and saddled up. I put the key in the ignition and pressed the starter.

It roared to life and a wave elation crashed over me. I haven't felt such an acute sense of euphoria in a long time. It's a small thing but I did it myself. I got help and guidance but I changed the battery with my own two hands. There's a deep satisfaction in doing the work and having it pay off.

'Godzilla' A Review

Godzilla is a reboot of the old franchise of the same name, Godzilla a radioactive feeding monster has been hibernating on the sea floor until he is awakened and comes to the surface. The plot doesn't much matter suffice it to say Godzilla appears and humans have to deal with him.

Visually the film is a treat. Dark yet clear, ominous and vibrant in equal measure. We always have a good view on the action and we are teased a couple times before the big, climactic Godzilla show down. The acting, narrative, and dialogue leave a lot to be desired. There seems to be a splitting of focus with the filmmakers trying to develop the story of Godzilla and the story of one of the families involved. The human element is completely lost and rings totally false so much so you have virtually no investment in any of the characters. The film makes a couple very blatant and distasteful gambits for sympathy by putting children in danger. All to no avail. Godzilla is the title and he should be the focus.

The film does a good job of quickly and efficiently explaining the origin of Godzilla but still languishes around for an hour and a half before he comes to the for front. This story is not a human story and by spending so much time trying to ingratiate us to some humans who do not matter we miss out on the real meat of the whole thing- the monster himself.

Comprises abound in this overlong mostly set-up version of Godzilla. Better than the 1998 version but that isn't saying much.

Don't See It.

Karmic Pendulum

It has been an unfortunate week. Unfortunate in circumstance at least. Monday Nicole's bike was stolen. Wednesday my motorcycle battery died. Thursday I snapped the pedal off my bicycle. It was all a bit much.

Normally that confluence of events would have driven me crazy. I'd have been convinced there was some unseen universal conspiracy to lay me low. The slow gears of spring are just now being greased and I am once again relegated to the CTA for my transportation! Who is behind this? What pious bloated deity has it in for me!?

Things have changed. And a situation that would have baffled me, enraged me, sent me all woe-is-me-ing, I was able to handle with a bit of grace. I didn't get mad, I didn't get anxious, I didn't get depressed. I wasn't overwhelmed. I was resigned and even slightly amused by the rapidity of the crumbling of my vehicles. I didn't react because ultimately it was all out of my control.

And it is all easily rectified. Over the weekend I carved out some time to go to the bike store and swing by the Autozone and it'll actually get done. My normal behavior would be to rage, mope, then procrastinate through most of the summer.

I am grateful for a life simple and manageable enough where something like this is an inconvenience but nothing more. Situations out of my control no longer(for the most part) send me off emotional peaks. With a clear head I'm able to easily navigate a situation which would have had me running to a dark bar room corner bitching the whole way. It's progress.

So I thank whatever spring pixies woken from their hibernation who came out and tinkered with my bikes both human and gasoline powered. It made me realize how far I've come.

Different Venue, Different Style

Last night Thunderdome was particularly rowdy. It was college themed dubbed Thunderdorm with Carmen joined by Danny and Max doing collegiate sketches with the improv mashups being given campuses to inspire them. Carmen has created a very unique and fertile space for performers to experiment and go-for-broke in front of a bizarre audience. Half of it is college kids the other half improvisers and even in the seating there is an unspoken segregation. There is an irreverent, raunchy, hungry energy about the show. The college kids come to be entertained, come to be raucous. We come to mess around and maybe push some buttons.

Carmen called me up to play for the last improv set of the night and I noticed I was playing differently. Hands in my pockets most of the scenes, lots of references, lots of retorts, lots of talking. At Thunderdome you're not going to play how you normally play. That, seemingly, is the idea. You are free from improv rules or predisposed form. You are playing with people from a variety of experience levels and perspectives so you need to adjust accordingly. The idea almost always with improv is to get laughs, barring that to entertain, so when you're in front of 50 drunk college students who most likely don't know a thing about improv what do you do? Its striking at Thunderdome when someone is sucking, it's an audience that is very vocal about what it likes and very silent about what it doesn't. 

Different venues and different crowds necessitate different playing styles and alternate approaches. If you're confident in your abilities you can paint with a variety of colors. A good performer is malleable and finds enjoyment in whatever he/she is doing but also finds how to elicit that same enjoyment out of whatever weird, hodge-podge crowd he/she finds him/herself in front of. 

At the Upstairs tonight a brand new team opened up for Big Trees and Dead$$$. They started off with personal monologues, a common counter-intuitive opening for new teams, and kind of crashed and burned from there. The Upstairs is also a place to be free and unencumbered. This new team was struggling to get things right and was clearly working very hard and taking little to no pleasure out of what they were doing. Their set was laid in stark contrast when Drennen and Daniel had their set and even more so when dead$$$ began and in the first couple minutes Scott came on and started executing people. Above pictured Brunlieb screaming "HIT ME AGAIN" after being repeatedly shot by Scott. The more veteran teams embraced the low stakes, the absurdity, milked the pleasure from a show going into total insanity.

Every show, audience, venue, suggestion, and circumstance is different. If you go into it with confidence, commitment, and little to no expectations you will most likely have fun ipso facto it will be fun to watch.

Graffiti 127

I got really into communism when I was in college. Read The Communist Manifesto and Guerrilla Warfare a bunch of times. I think the ideas of equality, solidarity, and action were what appealed to me. I never did much research into how communism was implemented(and failed), I just liked the idea of individual empowerment independent of wealth. When V For Vendetta came out in '05 I remember loving it. It got me really juiced to do something but I found nothing to actually do. The idea of revolution is great, without direction it is pointless.

"Let the ruling classes tremble at a communist revolution. The proletarians have nothing to lose but their chains. They have a world to win. Workingmen of all countries, unite!" -Karl Marx

"If you want to know the taste of a pear, you must change the pear by eating it yourself. If you want to know the theory and methods of revolution, you must take part in revolution. All genuine knowledge originates in direct experience." -Mao Zedong

"No advance in wealth, no softening of manners, no reform or revolution has ever brought human equality a millimeter nearer." -George Orwell

'Veronica Mars' & 'Cheap Thrills' Reviews

Veronica Mars is the seven years in the making, kickstarter funded, full length feature follow up to the teenage detective TV series of the same name. We encounter Veronica, as always impeccably portrayed by Kristen Bell, 9 years after the end of the TV show. Veronica is living in NYC, post law school, and interviewing for a job at a prestigious law firm. Veronica is on the precipice of a well paying job and taking the next step in her contented relationship with season 3's Piz when she gets a call from sometimes-villain always-dreamy Logan Echolls who is once again involved in a murder. The opportunity to gumshoe is too inviting and Veronica drops everything to head back to Neptune.

It is satisfying to revisit all the beloved characters of the original series, see how they've changed, and there is excitement in the parade of celebrity cameos(with a wonderful turn by Gabby Hoffmann). But the fundamental crime-solving mysteries of the show are some what lacking in it's big screen release. With numerous hanging threads, seemingly underdeveloped narrative, and plodding rhymes the story itself doesn't come close to the tight streamlined magic of seasons 1, 2, and is more on par with the compromised season 3.

Fans of the show will be delighted simply to see Veronica again but new comers to the character will not be enticed to unearth the VM cannon. They will more likely be confused. The film is bogged down by the desire and need to hit as many pre-established characters as it can at the expense of overall cohesion and focus.

Pleasant but ultimately unrealized.

Rent It.

Cheap Thrills is a dark comedy about two down-on-their luck high school friends who encounter each other by chance at a bar then get drawn into a series of contests by a mysterious rich couple. Each contest has a monetary prize starting off relatively low for relatively innocuous things but stakes raise as the propositions becoming more violent and destructive.

The film rests mostly on Pat Healy as Craig the husband and father with the most to lose(and gain) with Ethan Embry(buffed up and gruffed up since Can't Hardly Wait) as his mob debt collector friend mostly remaining two dimensional. Healy is unaccustomed and not quite qualified to be the lead in a film and his discomfort and inexperience shows. David Koechner(Colin) is the shinning star with a casual perversity he gently orchestrates the twisted tale doing the bidding of Sara Paxton(Violet) who, unfortunately, has virtually nothing to do.

The stunts accelerate to a thrilling fever pitch and the question is raised(and answered) what will people do for money? How far will they go? The ensuing emotional crescendos and carnage are exciting and it is satisfying to see the narrative draw mercilessly forward to its logical end. The theme or thesis is somewhat unclear, it is one thing to put these guys in this situation and see what they do but the film neglects to draw any conclusion. Through a sacrificing of character development for focus on brutal acts the deeper message the film tries to address is not realized.

Brutal, brave, and bizarre. Fun but lacking depth.

Rent It.

Tulip Haiku

A garden abode

favored by a single bloom

caged, quiet, and still

Mother's Day

Last night out front of CIC.

Jo: What'd you get your mom?
Tisher: Oh, nothing.
Jo: What about a card?
Tisher: No. It'll warrant a call surely.
Jo: But your siblings got her something.
Tisher: (snorts) No. That's not something we do.
Jo:(genuinely surprised, not judgmental) Wow. We get my mom something every two months, there's always an email chain going about it. Did you get your mom something?
Me: No. I got her a card this year though, first time since I was 8. Figured it was time to start making the gesture. I don't really get it but for some people it means a lot. Giving/receiving cards.
Jo: Oh for sure. Love language.

Gertrude

Took the bus back to Rockford today after work to pick up my motorcycle. I was dragging my feet because its kind of a pain to train out to O'Hare then bus into Rockford with all the construction on I-90. My folks are out of town at a wedding so family friend Shirley who I don't really know picked me up. It wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be.

After getting in and taking the motorcycle for a spin around the block any lingering irritates totally dissipated. There is nothing like riding a motorcycle and after five months away it felt like going home.

It is a difficult sensation to describe, an elusive pleasure to elucidate. It's like picking up an instrument after a long time of not playing and discovering not only have you forgotten nothing you're better than before. It's like typing, when you're writing something and the ideas are just flowing out of you and you spell everything right and don't miss a keystroke. It's like riding your bike after a long time away, but with a greater sense of power and speed and risk.

I was never one of those type of people that named their car in high school or came up with nick names for people or inanimate objects. But after getting this bike last year I figured she deserved a name. Something black and sleek that held such a resonance for me, that I would be going out into the world with, this thing joining me in this potentially dangerous activity, deserved a name. Gertrude.

'Oculus' Some Thoughts

-Nice to see Starbuck getting some work.

-At the beginning there was a five minute shot following the back of the female leads head with her pony tail swinging. What's with that?

-Of all hair dyes red is the most obvious. If you want a redhead in the movie cast one. Someone with vibrant, clearly dyed, red hair is distracting.

-I didn't notice until Vince pointed it out, the dad is the super-stoner from Dazed and Confused.

-Why don't they just break the mirror in the beginning?

-The son looks like Dawson era James Van Der Beek.

-What's with his hair? The lead in Endless Love had the same hair. Those cuts gotta be 25 years out of date. Maybe they're supposed to be dreamboaty? They are not.

-The movie had the chance to make a sharp turn from horror to psychological thriller but didn't take it. I wish it had.

-Not a whole lot of gore, what they had was earned.

-Glad we didn't see a ton of the stringy-black-hair-white-nighty-clad ghost. Ever since The Ring there seems to be only one kind of ghost you can have in horror movies.

-I'm starting to feel a bit old. Half of the movie is set in 2001 and implies that's "a long time ago". I am old if a movie set in 2001 is a "period piece".

-The ending was a clear gambit to get a sequel. Not satisfying, not cool.

Rent It.

Graffiti 126

I agree with the sentiment but the phrasing is a bit blunt. To be healthy people need to give and receive love. In equal measure to keep a balance. Give too much you are hollowed, take too much you are bloated.

The lesson, presumably, love as much as you can. Form a circuit with those people important and dear. Love flowing both ways. Feeding off each other for the mutual benefit and improvement of both.

You cannot pour so much love into someone it banishes their self consciousness and doubt. Nor can one person give you so much love it raises your self worth from low to high. Love will not fix you. You need to look inward before looking outward.

The act of loving is important. It's revitalizing, exciting, and necessary to a happy life. We are not creatures governed by hunger and procreation alone. We are complex feeling beings that require not only physical nourishment but mental and spiritual sustenance as well.

"There is no hope for us in this painful, mysterious world save in giving ourselves to love." -Byron Caldwell Smith

Sink Or Swim

I don't like change.
Or variances in routine.

I like things controlled.
And ordered.
Predictable.

Moving homes or moving friends
open the door to flux.

Possibilities endless and far reaching.
Fill up the quiet moments with a deafening
uncertainty.

An abrupt future weighs
on the mundane.
And courage is required

to leap into the void.

'Under The Skin' A Review

Under The Skin is an abstract alien thriller, the first movie from director Jonathan Glazer in a decade. The film opens with an extended abstract sequence out of space and time. With a harsh black and white setting and an even harsher score the first ten minutes of the movie have no dialogue and make no sense. We are then jolted to Scotland with the nameless lead played by Scarlett Johansson. She spends the majority of the movie driving around blank faced picking up men in order to lure them to her home. After she gets them their we see another abstract sequence in which the men are consumed by a goopy mirror like black tar.

The film has moments of brilliance. Some inspired physicality by Johansson, one moment specifically where she is naked in front of a space heater slowly and quietly examining her body. The nudity throughout the film is treated with a refreshing lack of sexuality and there are more dicks than boobs in the film(also refreshing). There are some beautiful shots of Scotland and some beautifully captured normal Scottish folks.

There is however no semblance of plot, narrative, or character. No semblance of motivation, change, or resolution. With dialogue so sparse and unclear it virtually doesn't exist the film recedes so far away from convention there is not only no text there is no subtext. Its abstraction is so drastic it belies its self-proclaimed premise.

Under The Skin has a steady and unavoidable stench of pretension. With numerous bizarre and shocking moments transparently contrived both self-serving and self-satisfied. A message so far distant from the actual content of the film you could make a case its about anything.

A visually interesting, narratively frustrating, ultimately unsatisfying alien movie more about metaphor deconstruction than aliens.

Don't See It.

First Spring Day

Although yesterday wasn't the first day of spring it was the first day that actually felt like spring. The first weekend day where the sun was out and the temperature was oscillating in the upper 60s.

Nicole and I mounted our bikes, mine recently purchased hers recently tuned up, and rode down the bike path. It was a wonderful relaxing lazy day.

We sat by the lake for a while and just enjoyed not having anything to do.

On a whim we headed over to the Lincoln Park Zoo. It was very crowded mostly with pregnant women and formerly pregnant women and their babies. The African painted dogs were a highlight. 

The main attraction of course was the lion. The King. Lording over the park from his sunning rock. He yawned a couple of times showing his large toothy maw. He may have been tired or he may have been showing off for his adoring crowd. Majestic.

Nicole had never been to the zoo or ridden down the bike path. It was a lovely day of firsts.

Partnership

A common purpose
an estranged past
meet as if by magic

through long discussion
and soul expression
intimacy is uncovered

not flowered romance
or sweeping fancy
but deep and fortified compassion.

Two lovers form
a bond with time
and look ahead with wonder.

Movie Going Suggestions

Me: Did you notice how many people left?
Chloe: Oh. I noticed.

Tonight Chloe and I went to see Under The Skin an odd, artsy, experimental type alien movie with Scarlett Johansson. The theater was packed and there were people trickling in during the trailers and the first 10 minutes of the movie. A number of people got up and left, presumably because of the tone or nudity in the movie, and there was a woman skrintching a plastic bag for the last 15 minutes or so. It was a bit of a distracting experience. Here are some suggestions to ensure a fluid and pleasurable movie going experience.

1. Have an idea of what it's about. You don't need to read a review or know the actors or the director or know a plot synopsis. But know what you're getting into. If it's an artsy alien movie or a depressing period drama you have certain expectations or can intuit what kind of a movie it's going to be. Unless you're a movie buff who sees movies indiscriminately don't wander into a movie theater and select the film that is most convenient for you time wise. This is doubly true if you're at an independent movie theater. The tone, content, or narrative(or lack there of) can surprise you if you haven't prepped sufficiently. You don't want to be caught on a Friday night seeing a movie that makes you feel uncomfortable or stupid.

2. Be on time. If you can, be on time. Find your seat and get yourself situated. This will prepare you for your cinematic experience and it is courteous to your fellow patrons. If you're all situated and quiet and have your drinks and snacks ready it limits interruptions which can impede on others experiences. If you arrive late, no big deal, slide into the nearest open seats, you have sacrificed your right to be choosey about where you sit. If the theater is packed go directly to the front. Don't ask people to move, don't stand in the walk way whispering to your friend, don't use your phone as a flashlight. You are late, the people already there were not late, respect that. Besides sitting up in the front can be fun, give it a try.

3. Be Quiet. Put your phone on silent and put it away. If you need to check the time do so discreetly. Be aware of who is around you and how close they are. If you are in a crowded theater go to the lobby if you need to do any extended phone use. You can whisper or react to your friend or loved one periodically but don't talk. Don't engage in a conversation. You can talk about the movie after. You are in a public place where people have paid money to see this thing, respect that. Be aware of your snacking volume. Don't be rustling in a plastic bag, opening a ton of packages, or adjusting the position of your bags once the movie has got going. If you need to open a delicious baggy of sour patch kids wait for a loud noise, a shouting scene, or anything that is not building suspense/a climax.

Simply put: be respectful. You are a human in a room with other humans.

'Blue Ruin' A Review

Blue Ruin is a small, tight, grim, revenge thriller set in Virginia. The film opens with transient Dwight(Macon Blair) taking a bath in a strangers house. It then follows him for a series of scenes with no dialogue. He is homeless and lives in his car. With a bushy beard and haunted downcast eyes Dwight is unassuming verging on pathetic. Things change when a cop brings him in and notifies him that the man imprisoned for killing his parents is being released. Dwight then gets his old Pontiac Bonneville running, the blue ruin of the title, and heads back to his home town to kill the man recently freed.

The film is shot beautifully and has a patient subdued tone which creates an organic thrumming suspense, inferring much to the audience by shot and score alone. There is an acute sense of authenticity about the film that brings it vibrancy. The focus is on character and emotion rather than circumstance, on the mundane minutiae and tools of revenge that make it credible. The dialogue is sparse but thick with subtext. Fascinating characters come into sharp clarity not through exposition, long-winded monologues, or over-complicated action sequences but through presence and image and situation.

At the center of it all Macon Blair gives an amazingly layered and complicated performance. He leads this bloody and pure film with an air of exhausted resignation and determination. The supporting cast is great but only Devin Ratray as best friend Ben matches Blair's nuance.

A refreshing, personal, and engrossing look at rural Virginian revenge that touches the heart and keeps its beat jacked.

Don't Miss It.

'Blue Ruin' opens tomorrow at the Music Box in Chicago. See it while you can, it is currently only playing through May 8th.