Wedding Day

A lifetime

narrows
to a day

an hour

an instant

nestled within

the endearing

enduring energies

of our

closest intimates

propped up

and propagated

by romantic momentum

bonded 

by magnetic ardor

in this pin-prick

potent now

we pledge our truth

and the world

kaleidoscopic

psychedelic

opens, unfurls, erupts

and a future

fleeting

bright with promise

is revealed.

The Numbers For 2018

Year #6 without a drink. I didn't do it alone, I couldn't. I've stayed sober because of the help of others and the grace of my Higher Power.

I read 62 books my top 5 were The Sudden Appearance of Hope, The Long Way to a Small Angry Planet, The Minotaur Takes A Cigarette Break, The Anubis Gates, and Paradox Bound.

I saw 82 movies in the theater.

I fired a gun for the first time.

We(Nicole and I) went to 2 author events(Christina Henry and Esther Perel).

We went to 2 Michelin starred restaurants(Topolobampo and Parachute).

We went to 4 weddings.

We went ice skating once.

I went on 3 vacations (Richmond, motorcycle trip around Lake Michigan, New Mexico).

I saw 1 adolescent hero- Broon.

I did 48 shows with Deep Schwa.

I did 47 shows with Sight Unseen.

I did 9 shows with Plane Station.

I did 4 shows with Terrific Six(various mixes of members from my first improv team The Album).

I directed 1 solo show.

I understudied and performed in the play Deerfield Inn once.

I wrote 68 poems, 3 essays, and did 9 readings.

I rode my motorcycle for 6 months.

I went to 1 magic show.

I went to 0 funerals.

I went to 0 plays.

I went to 0 concerts.

I helped celebrate my niece's 2nd birthday.

Nicole and I celebrated our 5th Anniversary.

A full year, a satisfying year, a fast year. I'm grateful for each and every day.

The Numbers For 2017

Year #5 without a drink. Thanks to all the friends, family, and strangers who helped along the way.

I went on 4 vacations(Harrisburg, NYC, Denver, New Orleans).

I did 48 shows with Deep Schwa.

I did 45 shows with Sight Unseen.

The Night Shift did 1 show.

I co-wrote and performed 1 sketch show 5 times.

I conceived and shot 20 interviews for a documentary tentatively titled Chiaroscuro.

I wrote 62 poems, 1 essay, and did 6 readings.

I watched 78 movies in the theater.

I read 68 books my favorite of which was The Antagonist by Lynn Coady.

I went to 1 concert(Willie Nelson).

I saw 1 of my heroes in the flesh(Chris Rock).

I went to 2 plays(Linda Vista, Doll's House Part 2).

I went to 2 weddings.

I went to 0 funerals.

I went to 2 Michelin starred restaurants.

I moved once.

I babysat my niece for the first time.

I learned and cooked 6 crock pot recipes.

I rode my motorcycle for 7 months. I changed the battery once.

Nicole and I celebrated our 4th Anniversary.

I'm grateful for it all.

HP's Wedding

One of my oldest friends got married yesterday. I've known Heather, who I've always called HP, since 2000 when we started working together at a local day camp. We went on to do plays together in high school and have been friends ever since. The ceremony was beautiful and right outside the Fort Hunter Mansion overlooking the river. It was a relatively intimate affair and I got to catch up with some old friends, all in all a really wonderful celebration.

Mikey and HP were originally going to get married in Illinois where both their families are from. They were compromising with their folks to have a smaller wedding but with extended family invited. That kind of fell through and the result was they would get married in Harrisburg, where they live, with their parents and friends in attendance then go back west for a more typical family reception. Although I'm guessing how that all shock out might have been a little bit contentious I think the result was very cool. The majority of weddings, to me, feel the same, feel kind of innocuously public. So realizing that totally excluding extended and distant relatives wasn't an option but wanting a more intimate gathering they decided to do both. I thought that was a great compromise. And as a wedding attendee actually being able to interact and talk with my friend who was getting married, as opposed to a perfunctory hug and a brief exchange of pleasantries, I found it to have much more meaning. Hopefully its the beginning of a trend.

Wedding Day

Got up this morning and Nicole and I went for a walk in a forest preserve which was around the corner from the house we're staying in.

It was incredibly beautiful. Purple flowers as far as the eye could see.

I'm guessing our timing was pretty perfect with the blooming of whatever flowers these are. Really striking, they covered everything.

The wedding ceremony was brief and perfect. The sun was setting and the weather was surprisingly cooperative. My date, my love, my queen pictured above.

Jose, the groom, with the women of their improv team Big Spoon. The reception, all in all, was joyous. Casual, fun, great food, and a cookie table. Couldn't have asked for a better evening in which to celebrate or a better celebration for the newlyweds.

Florida Wedding

The past couple days Nicole and I have been in Daytona Beach at Nicole's parents house for her sister Kim's wedding. It's been a whirlwind couple of days what with family dinners, preparation, and the typically intense Florida heat. This morning Nicole and I woke up early for a swim in the ocean. It was incredibly warm and calm. Soothing and energizing. I've only swam in the ocean a couple times in my life. This time- in the early morning hours, on a mostly deserted beach, in the company of my loving partner- was the most significant.

After our swim Nicole went off with her sister to have a sibling breakfast and get their hair done. I helped Nicole's parents get things ready for the ceremony. It was an intimate affair, the smallest wedding I had been to, they're were around 18 people total. The ceremony was on the beach then we had the reception at a local country club.

What struck me the most about it was how happy Kim and Sean were. The whole event wasn't very complicated so I think they were able to make it exactly how they wanted it to be and enjoy it with none of the stressors that can come with a more involved wedding.

It was wonderful to be included in such a close family event, I was able to get to know Nicole's family a lot better, and really feel like I was a part of the whole thing. Overall a beautiful and joyous day.

The Numbers For 2014

For the second year in a row I went 365 days without a drink.

I went on two vacations, one to Richmond, VA the other to New York City.

I saw 72 movies in the theater.

Deep Schwa had 51 shows.

Prime had 49 shows.

The Night Shift had 20 shows.

The Hague had 3 shows and was cut.

We formed Sight Unseen and had 12 shows.

I read 37 books, my favorite of which was My Real Children by Jo Walton.

I wrote 46 poems and did 5 readings.

Tisher, Tim, and I released 10 episodes of Bubble Boys compromising season 2 completing the series.

Tim and I recorded the first season of a new podcast The Hindsight Hour yet to be released.

I conceived of and co-wrote a play, Contention, which will open in the new year.

I made 1 collage.

I made 1 mix tape.

I wrote 1 song.

I moved twice.

I went to 1 audition.

I rode my motorcycle for 7 glorious months.

I went to 0 concerts.

I went to 11 plays.

I went to 2 weddings.

I went to 0 funerals.

I had the love of a beautiful and supportive woman for the entire year.

Vince & Amy

Tonight was Vince and Amy's wedding. A beautiful ceremony with heartfelt vows, music, and a lot of improv friends participating. There was a great balance of humor and sincerity during the ceremony that really conveyed who Vince and Amy are.

The reception was wonderful, so many friends in attendance, dancing compliments of DJ Drennen, local BBQ, cake, donuts, the whole works.

It was a real joy, a genuine celebration of two incredible people. There was a lot of talk about Vince and Amy's loyalty, sense of humor, and kindness which couldn't have rung more true.

I was at the party the night they met. It's been a pleasure to see them come together, grow, and blossom over the past couple years. They are a couple I look to for guidance. On how to support, balance, and communicate. A great match, a blessed union, two starry-eyed goofballs.

Wedding Day

The day of the wedding dawned and I went to go sit with Marta as she got her hair done. Very interesting and fun to see what goes on with brides in high-end salons. I got a peak behind the curtain no man is meant to see.

Later, the groomsmen got ready at the venue and took some pictures, the photographers were really cool, shockingly personable and pliant with the ever-shifting wedding schedule. Above, the readied reception room.

Marta's bouquet.

Nicole and my cousin Chloe with my Aunt Julie and Uncle Mike in the back. Ceremony imminent.

My grandma and I talked poetry before I walked her down the isle to kick things off.

The ceremony was gorgeous. It sprinkled for about thirty seconds and then the skies were clear and the sun shown. I didn't expect to get emotional but of course I did. A family friend Randy officiated and at the beginning said the names of the relatives who have passed. Our grandfather Irv Nelson and our Uncles Mark Brannon and John Pritz. Their spirits were with us today.

Both our parents walked my sister down the isle and it was all I could do to keep it together. It was a beautiful union.

The ceremony ended with a kids parade, they had noisemakers and streamers and we all marched out to "When The Saints Go Marching In" the same song my parents recessed to.

The rest of the day is kind of a blur. The reception was wonderful, best wedding food I've ever had, everyone mingled and it was wild to see all the different people connected by my nuclear family. The speeches were great with a surpirse slam dunk from the best man Ryan. I talked to a ton, but not all, of my relatives and Nicole and I did some dancing. By 11 we were both all in but we stuck around and were the last ones to leave helping my parents clean up when they were both dead on their feet. Nicole handled the event and all the family with so much grace, I couldn't ask for a more loving and understanding partner, couldn't be more grateful to share this day with her.

Marta was beautiful, Nick was dapper, they were both exceedingly happy. A victory, a success, a joy.

Wedding Rehearsal

This morning the venue got set up under the supervision and tyrannical grip of my mom and Aunt Judy. My dad and I picked up my cousin Lauren(left) from the bus to help, my sister(center) came by to approve everything, and I just mostly tried to stay out of the way. The reception room is in the far end of the Rockford Discovery Center right next to the river, the ceremony is going to be in a little amphitheater about 150 feet away. All my favorite weddings have had the same self contained set up, the ceremony and the reception in the same location, no lag-time/all celebration.

The rehearsal went smoothly as they all seem to, the ritual of the wedding, for me at least, is pretty ingrained. There's a couple different variations but it's all riffing off of the same structure. The processional, the readings, the vows. They are all unique but the set ups are similar so it's never too hard to figure out where to stand, when to walk, what to say. We have the comfort of the established format and the bride and groom provide their singular flare.

Marta and Nick picked a beautiful spot, next to water was one of Marta's stipulations, and even though tomorrow has a chance of rain I have confidence the gods of thunder and storm will bestow sunshine on their Norse daughter.

Wedding Weekend

I came back to Rockford last night in preparation for my sister's wedding Saturday. There's a lot of i's to dot and a lot of t's to cross but things are coming together. As the day approaches and people start rolling into town I realize how large my extended family is, aunts and uncles and lots and lots of cousins, Bannens, Brannons, and Nelsons. Some of whom I haven't seen in years, some I may have only seen once or twice, but blood binds and there is shorthand with family however distant.

My goal this weekend is just to be available, to be ready and willing to do whatever is asked of me by my sister, her soon to be husband Nick, or my folks. To be patient, accommodating, and as kind as possible. I'm sure in the next couple days tempers will be short and there will be at least one crisis. People will be tired and there will be countless errands to run. But already I can feel this immense and unwavering outpouring of love.

It's an exciting and momentous time for the Nelson clan, anticipation builds.

Steve's Guide To A Sucessful Wedding Experience

Matt and Katie, the day of. Photo credit to HO.

1. Don't be the drunk one. There always seems to be one or two people at a wedding who are way too drunk, so a couple steps to not be that person. Don't pre-game, there's no reason to. Regulate your intake until all pre-planned parts of the wedding are over with i.e. speeches, first dance, cutting the cake etc. After all that is done go to town, just don't put yourself in a position where either the bride or groom has to do damage control. Remember, it's their day.

2. Dance. Older folks and kids will usually start off the dancing so there's no pressure to get the dancing going early on in the reception. But at some point you need to get out there and dance. If you think you can't dance, newsflash, you can, if you're not comfortable dancing post-up by a friend who is and they will ease you in, if you need to just copy what they're doing. The bride and groom want to feel like they're having a successful reception, nothing says successful reception like a packed dance floor. Dancing is fun.

3. Keep your emotions in check. It's ok and expected to get teared up during the ceremony and when the bride dances with her father. But over the top displays of emotion pull focus from the people who the event is really about, the bride and groom. We're all really happy for them but throwing a lot of emotion at a couple who is probably stressed, tired, hungry, and overwhelmed is not helpful. Give them a big hug and tell them you love them. No tears.

4. Save a slow dance for the single folks. Lonesome George can pop up pretty easily at weddings. If you see a single person looking lonely in a corner ask them to slow dance, you were once alone, it's not fun.

5. Hook-Up. Weddings are a real aphrodisiac. Grab a special someone, pull them close, and kiss.

6. Do what they tell you. Do whatever the bride and groom want you to do. You're there first and foremost to make their day special and go the way they want it to. Your enjoyment is secondary.

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